Sunday, May 20, 2007
Sleeping Beauties!
These precious children fell asleep on my bed! I think Titus and Willy enjoyed the company too! (My stuffed pets!)
The circle of Prayer
This was the close of our worship before going inside to watch pictures from this last year! It was a beautiful big circle and made me wonder what it will be like in Heaven when we all gather around the heavenly throne!
The Adventure of hiking Mt. San Jacinto
As usual, the magic of the morning dawn was powerful as we began our climb into the mountains to find the trail head!
This is the collection of photo's from last Wednesday's hike that I promised!
Every time I go to the mountains, I fall in love again!!
"I will lift up mine eyes to the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the Lord, which made heaven and earth..." Psalms 121
At 10,800 feet! :-)
The second mountain peak to the left in the distance (behind me) is Mt. San Bernadino, which we climbed a couple weeks ago! Mt. San Gorgonio is the one right behind me to the left that kinda looks a little bald!! It will be in the future as well, hopefully!
Thursday, May 17, 2007
His strength is made perfect in our weakness...
Wow!!!!! I can't explain how happy I am and while incredibly exhausted, at the same time, I feel soooooo full of energy!!!! I was practically singing all the way home from work...and the reason that's sooo incredible is because driving to work this morning, I was like, "God....I'm just sooo tired...I don't know if I can face all the demands of the work-force today!!! Please give me grace and extra strength..."
And He did!!!! It's as simple as that!!
In fact, today was one of those days that I felt truly fulfilled being a nurse! I didn't leave any loose ends undone, I actually succeeded at being the go-between btw doctors and patients and keeping both parties happy, and I felt like God helped me to make a real difference in more than just one persons day!!! It wasn't any less hectic than the rest, nor were my patients a "model bunch" yet, it was just a special day all the way around!
I am continually amazed at the way God keeps working in my life and opening doors for me to share hope and encouragement! The highlight of today, amidst many blessings, was that God led a seeking middle age gentleman across my path. I guess I should clarify "what" he was seeking! ;-) He was actually in for "Chest pain, Rule out MI" but more then the physical heart problems, he was dealing with some incredible heart-break over a broken relationship. And he was seeking hope and a reason to go on!
When I got report, I was told that he was anxious and cried off and on, and they had to give him anxiety meds a lot. So I was interested to learn more about him and see if I could help. Well, sure enough...God opened the doors! He had gone out to the patio to get some fresh air and had grabbed a Gideon Bible from his room. (Thank God for the Gideons!) And appeared to be haphazardly reading here and there in Psalms. I came out to check on him and ask how he was doing (I'd asked before and he hadn't really opened up, so I had tried not to pry). However, this time, he just started crying when I asked. He told me about all the health issues he'd been dealing with recently, and how it was unbearable. Then, after listening and empathizing a bit, I asked if he had much family support and how things were for him personally, and he cried the harder as he told how his girl-friend of 5 years had left him. He was truly broken and bleeding...and I wished I could wrap my arms around him (in a motherly fashion), but I just listened.
Finally, he paused and amidst the tears, waited to see what I thought of it all! And I was able to encourage him that God truly was with Him and wanted to give him strength and healing and a new purpose for life. I could tell that he was truly all ears, and soaked in every word! Toward the end of our talk, I shared with him Psalms 147:3 "He healeth the broken in heart and bindeth up their wounds." He seemed to latch on to the hope that God could and would heal the pain...and before I left, I was able to pray with him!
Later, as I was at the nurses station giving report to the next shift, he came up just to say "Thank you!" He had a big smile on his face and while I could tell there was pain, He seemed much more at peace! I just praise the Lord!!!!!! He is sooo good!!! (And I never gave him any anxiety meds!!!) However, before I left the floor, I did slip back to his room to give him the booklet "Soul Care - How to become whole in a broken world." And he just grabbed my hand in the firmest handshake and would hardly let go! What a joy to be part of the link in the great chain to share the HOPE and HEALING that there is in Christ!!!!
My heart and desire is to reach all my patients and co-workers for Christ...yet...the task is overwhelming, and there are sooo many people and soooo many obstacles. It can often be discouraging!!
There is a story of a man that was walking along the beach and gently tossing stranded star fish back into the ocean, one by one. Someone stopped him and asked, "Why do you bother! There are sooo many, you can't possibly make that much difference??" The man continued to bend down and gently toss them, one by one, back to the water. Then he answered... "Maybe I can't make that much difference...but...I made a difference to that one....and to that one...and to that one!"
And so the story gives me courage as it reminds me that while I may not be able to take on the whole world...it's just about reaching one person at a time! I CAN make a difference to that ONE...and maybe that ONE...and maybe that ONE...
So...today just goes to show, that when we are at our weakest, God can work His strongest! I knew I could do nothing today...but because God is in charge, not me...He can do anything and everything...I just have to keep allowing Him to be the one at the controls!!!! I just praise Him!!!
*Mom - I know I shouldn't stay up soooo late blogging....but....I get sooo inspired about the daily events that I know if I don't write it down now, I'll forget, because something else will happen!!! And God has been giving me soo many precious lessons lately...that I just can't allow myself to forget or keep them locked in my heart!!! God is sooo good! I wish the whole world could know how Faithful He is!!!!
And He did!!!! It's as simple as that!!
In fact, today was one of those days that I felt truly fulfilled being a nurse! I didn't leave any loose ends undone, I actually succeeded at being the go-between btw doctors and patients and keeping both parties happy, and I felt like God helped me to make a real difference in more than just one persons day!!! It wasn't any less hectic than the rest, nor were my patients a "model bunch" yet, it was just a special day all the way around!
I am continually amazed at the way God keeps working in my life and opening doors for me to share hope and encouragement! The highlight of today, amidst many blessings, was that God led a seeking middle age gentleman across my path. I guess I should clarify "what" he was seeking! ;-) He was actually in for "Chest pain, Rule out MI" but more then the physical heart problems, he was dealing with some incredible heart-break over a broken relationship. And he was seeking hope and a reason to go on!
When I got report, I was told that he was anxious and cried off and on, and they had to give him anxiety meds a lot. So I was interested to learn more about him and see if I could help. Well, sure enough...God opened the doors! He had gone out to the patio to get some fresh air and had grabbed a Gideon Bible from his room. (Thank God for the Gideons!) And appeared to be haphazardly reading here and there in Psalms. I came out to check on him and ask how he was doing (I'd asked before and he hadn't really opened up, so I had tried not to pry). However, this time, he just started crying when I asked. He told me about all the health issues he'd been dealing with recently, and how it was unbearable. Then, after listening and empathizing a bit, I asked if he had much family support and how things were for him personally, and he cried the harder as he told how his girl-friend of 5 years had left him. He was truly broken and bleeding...and I wished I could wrap my arms around him (in a motherly fashion), but I just listened.
Finally, he paused and amidst the tears, waited to see what I thought of it all! And I was able to encourage him that God truly was with Him and wanted to give him strength and healing and a new purpose for life. I could tell that he was truly all ears, and soaked in every word! Toward the end of our talk, I shared with him Psalms 147:3 "He healeth the broken in heart and bindeth up their wounds." He seemed to latch on to the hope that God could and would heal the pain...and before I left, I was able to pray with him!
Later, as I was at the nurses station giving report to the next shift, he came up just to say "Thank you!" He had a big smile on his face and while I could tell there was pain, He seemed much more at peace! I just praise the Lord!!!!!! He is sooo good!!! (And I never gave him any anxiety meds!!!) However, before I left the floor, I did slip back to his room to give him the booklet "Soul Care - How to become whole in a broken world." And he just grabbed my hand in the firmest handshake and would hardly let go! What a joy to be part of the link in the great chain to share the HOPE and HEALING that there is in Christ!!!!
My heart and desire is to reach all my patients and co-workers for Christ...yet...the task is overwhelming, and there are sooo many people and soooo many obstacles. It can often be discouraging!!
There is a story of a man that was walking along the beach and gently tossing stranded star fish back into the ocean, one by one. Someone stopped him and asked, "Why do you bother! There are sooo many, you can't possibly make that much difference??" The man continued to bend down and gently toss them, one by one, back to the water. Then he answered... "Maybe I can't make that much difference...but...I made a difference to that one....and to that one...and to that one!"
And so the story gives me courage as it reminds me that while I may not be able to take on the whole world...it's just about reaching one person at a time! I CAN make a difference to that ONE...and maybe that ONE...and maybe that ONE...
So...today just goes to show, that when we are at our weakest, God can work His strongest! I knew I could do nothing today...but because God is in charge, not me...He can do anything and everything...I just have to keep allowing Him to be the one at the controls!!!! I just praise Him!!!
*Mom - I know I shouldn't stay up soooo late blogging....but....I get sooo inspired about the daily events that I know if I don't write it down now, I'll forget, because something else will happen!!! And God has been giving me soo many precious lessons lately...that I just can't allow myself to forget or keep them locked in my heart!!! God is sooo good! I wish the whole world could know how Faithful He is!!!!
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
"Thank God for blisters, for they have a tale to tell...
While others suffer from inactivity, I've been moving very well!!"
That's what I thought of this afternoon as Jen and I descended the 4,000+ feet of elevation from our climb up Mt. San Jacinto! (Yes, we decided to take on yet another mountain!!!) Unfortunately, I wasn't in tip-top shape to begin with, as I feel like this last week has been a marathon for me.....rushing here, running there...long hours at work...short on sleep...much to do getting prepared for this weekend...not to mention planting some vegetables in my back patio and tending to my flower beds which seem to be sprouting weeds quicker than I can turn around! (Reminds me of raising children...as soon as you get them watered/fed and cleaned up, they are dirty and hungry again! And that's been the story of my plants!!!)
So when we started our steep climb about 6am this morning (Got up again at 4am to be ready to go so we could hit the trail early), I was definitely on the low side of energy and enthusiasm!! Don't get me wrong, I wanted to climb the mountain...and as we are planning on taking a group to hike Mt. Whitney in June, I need to build my endurance up...but...sometimes...much as I love hiking and the exhilaration of reaching yet another peak...sometimes you just get tired! And today was one of those days!! As my grandma use to say, I felt like "My get up and go, got up and went!"
But it was a beautiful day...and as usual Jen and had a wonderful time!!!! And the almost 12 miles (total trip) were worth the effort after having reached the top! Coming down was a challenge though, as I began to feel a blister in development! (I already had some from my gardening adventures yesterday!) My breaks were also starting to burn out...as there wasn't much I could do to keep my toes from cramming into the ends of my hiking boots, so I wasn't real comfortable! But as I hobbled along near the end of our journey, the thought hit me... "Thank God for blisters!" And the above rhyme came to my head.
Daily I meet people who don't have the physical health that they could go climb a mountain, let alone walk down the street. Daily I meet people who don't have space where they live for any gardening, much less the know-how to make something grow! Daily I meet people who even if they did have the skills have lost their vision and purpose in living, and have no more desire to do something constructive with their time than they have to turn off the tube!!! Yes, blisters and sore muscles are painful...but they are the sign of an incredible blessing and opportunity that God has given me every day! The ability to use my hands, the ability to test my endurance...and most importantly the ability to reach out to others.
On Monday I met another young girl who was in the hospital for an overdose (attempted suicide) and was the picture of hopelessness and despair. I've taken care of a number of failed suicide attempts now...and with each one somehow, God has opened the doors for me to share His love and His desire to make something special of their lives! (It wasn't an accident that their attempt to end their life failed!) And with Sarah (a pseudonym) things were the same. As soon as I found out that she was gonna be my patient I knew that God had another special mission in store for my day, and I was right! God providentially, as He so beautifully does, opened the doors wide open for me to have quite the heart to hear talk with her...and it ended with her re-consecrating her life to God with the plan to make a new start. Needless to say, although Monday was a tiring day and I was exhausted from running up and down the hospital halls tending to 10 patients...I was sooooo glad that I'd been called in to work on that day!!!
So, how do all my stories tie together? Well, today that linking thread was "blisters." Blisters from hiking a really high mountain, or being an industrious gardener are "worthy scars" I suppose. But I was thinking...what if I were soooooooooo intent about doing the Lord's work that I was getting blisters from that! (I'm not quite sure what those would look like!) But I've the distinct impression, that much as I love God and I desire to serve Him with each breath I take, I still fall way short of what I could be doing through Him and His strength in reaching those around me! He's given me a body and hands, a heart, a mind, a voice....so many gifts....gifts that many don't have....gifts that I often take forgranted. But are they being put to work as enthusiastically for Him as they have been in attacking the vegetable garden and the weeds?! Are the gifts God's given me gaining blisters and battles scars for the eternal kingdom?? Deep questions and worth pondering for all of us, I am sure!!
My marathon is not over...the next couple weeks promise to keep me hopping and on my toes! I've also got another couple long days at the hospital before my week is over. (Thankfully next week is it and I'm done until God leads further!) Although exhilerated from the beautiful day up in the mountains, I am still tired...just as I was when I started! So in closing, I'll just share a verse that's spoken to me the last few days...
"I can do ALL things THROUGH CHRIST who gives me STRENGTH." Phil 4:13
PS: More Pics to be posted soon from today's hiking adventures!
While others suffer from inactivity, I've been moving very well!!"
That's what I thought of this afternoon as Jen and I descended the 4,000+ feet of elevation from our climb up Mt. San Jacinto! (Yes, we decided to take on yet another mountain!!!) Unfortunately, I wasn't in tip-top shape to begin with, as I feel like this last week has been a marathon for me.....rushing here, running there...long hours at work...short on sleep...much to do getting prepared for this weekend...not to mention planting some vegetables in my back patio and tending to my flower beds which seem to be sprouting weeds quicker than I can turn around! (Reminds me of raising children...as soon as you get them watered/fed and cleaned up, they are dirty and hungry again! And that's been the story of my plants!!!)
So when we started our steep climb about 6am this morning (Got up again at 4am to be ready to go so we could hit the trail early), I was definitely on the low side of energy and enthusiasm!! Don't get me wrong, I wanted to climb the mountain...and as we are planning on taking a group to hike Mt. Whitney in June, I need to build my endurance up...but...sometimes...much as I love hiking and the exhilaration of reaching yet another peak...sometimes you just get tired! And today was one of those days!! As my grandma use to say, I felt like "My get up and go, got up and went!"
But it was a beautiful day...and as usual Jen and had a wonderful time!!!! And the almost 12 miles (total trip) were worth the effort after having reached the top! Coming down was a challenge though, as I began to feel a blister in development! (I already had some from my gardening adventures yesterday!) My breaks were also starting to burn out...as there wasn't much I could do to keep my toes from cramming into the ends of my hiking boots, so I wasn't real comfortable! But as I hobbled along near the end of our journey, the thought hit me... "Thank God for blisters!" And the above rhyme came to my head.
Daily I meet people who don't have the physical health that they could go climb a mountain, let alone walk down the street. Daily I meet people who don't have space where they live for any gardening, much less the know-how to make something grow! Daily I meet people who even if they did have the skills have lost their vision and purpose in living, and have no more desire to do something constructive with their time than they have to turn off the tube!!! Yes, blisters and sore muscles are painful...but they are the sign of an incredible blessing and opportunity that God has given me every day! The ability to use my hands, the ability to test my endurance...and most importantly the ability to reach out to others.
On Monday I met another young girl who was in the hospital for an overdose (attempted suicide) and was the picture of hopelessness and despair. I've taken care of a number of failed suicide attempts now...and with each one somehow, God has opened the doors for me to share His love and His desire to make something special of their lives! (It wasn't an accident that their attempt to end their life failed!) And with Sarah (a pseudonym) things were the same. As soon as I found out that she was gonna be my patient I knew that God had another special mission in store for my day, and I was right! God providentially, as He so beautifully does, opened the doors wide open for me to have quite the heart to hear talk with her...and it ended with her re-consecrating her life to God with the plan to make a new start. Needless to say, although Monday was a tiring day and I was exhausted from running up and down the hospital halls tending to 10 patients...I was sooooo glad that I'd been called in to work on that day!!!
So, how do all my stories tie together? Well, today that linking thread was "blisters." Blisters from hiking a really high mountain, or being an industrious gardener are "worthy scars" I suppose. But I was thinking...what if I were soooooooooo intent about doing the Lord's work that I was getting blisters from that! (I'm not quite sure what those would look like!) But I've the distinct impression, that much as I love God and I desire to serve Him with each breath I take, I still fall way short of what I could be doing through Him and His strength in reaching those around me! He's given me a body and hands, a heart, a mind, a voice....so many gifts....gifts that many don't have....gifts that I often take forgranted. But are they being put to work as enthusiastically for Him as they have been in attacking the vegetable garden and the weeds?! Are the gifts God's given me gaining blisters and battles scars for the eternal kingdom?? Deep questions and worth pondering for all of us, I am sure!!
My marathon is not over...the next couple weeks promise to keep me hopping and on my toes! I've also got another couple long days at the hospital before my week is over. (Thankfully next week is it and I'm done until God leads further!) Although exhilerated from the beautiful day up in the mountains, I am still tired...just as I was when I started! So in closing, I'll just share a verse that's spoken to me the last few days...
"I can do ALL things THROUGH CHRIST who gives me STRENGTH." Phil 4:13
PS: More Pics to be posted soon from today's hiking adventures!
Sunday, May 13, 2007
Happy Mother's Day to TWO of my MOST Favorite and influential women in my life!!!
First I want to say THANK YOU to my mom whose "genes" I wear! ;-)
You are one of the most amazing and incredible women I know...who loves without condition, and whose vibrancy and love of life are contagious! Even despite the years of physical pain...you are my inspiration... the energizer bunny that keeps on going!!! ;-) I hope when I reach 55, I'll still be as active and ambitious and daring as you! (Climbing mountains and trees, planting gardens, digging into scripture, loving as many people as you can, sharing encouragement and understanding, and as industrious and productive as people half your age!!) I'm sooo proud to call you "Mother" and we all (Homer, Daniel, Faith, and Daddy) are soooo blessed to have you in our lives! In fact, I can't imagine what life would be like without you!!!! Thankfully, we have all eternity to spend together!!!
Happy Mother's Day to a one-of-a-kind!!! I love you!
Special Memories from GYC this past December!
We have many great memories over the years...some of the best are from our travels around the United States, going up to Niagara Falls, hiking in Colorado or Montana, or along the beaches in Florida or the East Coast...or treeplanting thousands of trees up in Minnesota!! Only God knows how many miles we've all traveled around the world! And our greatest journey is yet to come!!!
Thanks for the many great memories Mother, and for the example you give daily of "sacrifice and love!" I am sooo richly blessed!!!
And now to my "adopted Mom" whose love I could never "FRO-GET"
Mom, you and I and frogs have a lot of stories we could tell, don't we??! ;-)
I just want to take this opportunity to tell you (and all of the world that will listen) what a blessing and inspiration you have been and are to me! From taking me under your wings when I was a little high-school student many years ago, to opening up your home and heart, and giving me another place to call my own!!!! You've been there sooo many times just when I needed you over the last 15 years! Your stability, godly wisdom and love have made an incredible difference in my life and in who God is leading me to become!! THANK YOU!!!!
Thank you for being my "second" Mom!!! Thank you for WHO you are...and most importantly, thank you for pointing my eyes to who HE is!!!! I will be forever grateful!!!
OUR DAY OUT!
Some of my favorite memories from the years are the times we've played together....whether wrestling, playing games, racquetball, hiking...taking vacations to Colorado, being crammed in cars or buses for hours at a time, talking all night long, or just laughing at the idiosyncrasies of life! Thanks for the memories!
Came upon this reading this morning in the book "Streams in the Desert." And I have to smile, because time and time again, I've seen these things to be true in my own life and prayers!
I share it because I hope it will also be a blessing and encouragement to all of you!
-----------------------
Much that perplexes us in our Christian experience is but the answer to our prayers. We pray for patience, and our Father sends those who tax us to the utmost; for "tribulation worketh patience."
We pray for submission, and God sends sufferings; for "we learn obedience by the things we suffer." We pray for unselfishness, and God gives us opportunities to sacrifice ourselves by thinking on the things of others, and by laying down our lives for the brethren.
We pray for strength and humility, and some messenger of Satan torments us until we lie in the dust crying for its removal.
We pray, "Lord increase our faith," and money takes wings; or the children are alarmingly ill; or a servant comes who is careless, extravagant, untidy or slow, or some hitherto unknown trial calls for an increase of faith along a line where we have not needed to exercise much faith before.
We pray for the Lamb-like life, and are given a portion of lowly service, or we are injured and must seek no redress; for "He was led as a lamb to the slaughter...and opened not his mouth."
We pray for gentleness, and there comes a perfect storm of temptation to harshness and irritability. We pray for quietness, and every nerve is strung to the utmost tension, so that looking to Him we may learn that when He giveth quietness, no one can make trouble.
We pray for love, and God sends peculiar suffering and puts us with apparently unlovely people, and lets them say things which rasp the nerves and lacerate the heart; for love suffereth long and is kind, love is not impolite, love is not provoked. Love beareth all things, believeth, hopeth and endureth. Love never faileth.
We pray for likeness to Jesus, and the answer is, "I have chosen thee in the furnance of affliction." "Can thine heart endure, or can thine hands be strong."
The way to peace and victory is to accept every circumstance, every trial, straight from the hand of a loving Faither; and to live up in the heavenly places, above the clouds, in the very presence of the throne, and to look down from the glory upon our environment as lovingly and divinely appointed.
-Author Unknown-
--------------------------
The moral of the story, "Be careful what you pray for, because you just might get it!!!" ;-)
I say that kinda jokingly, but seriously, as I am learning...God knows better than ourselves what we need, and due to some painful experiences in my life, I once tried to tie God's hands behind His back (if that is possible) and I told God, I don't want any more growth if it involves pain. While my life did not instantly become free of trial and pain...it did slowly become free of meaning and real joy, for I had limited God! I was not willing to allow God to send me things to help me grow, and when He did...I resented them.
Finally within this last year I have been able to release God's hands (as if I ever had them tied anyway) and tell Him, "God...no matter what you send me in my life, I want to grow and be close to YOU!!!! If it involves pain, I'm willing, if it involves trials and sacrifice I am willing......please don't let me limit what you want to do in my life! No matter what you bring, I will trust you!!!! My greatest goal is simply to be close to YOU!!!"
Since I've prayed that prayer.....well.....there's been some more trials and tears, but there is a peace that passeth understanding, and I know that He's only allowing what is for my best good!!!! The refining process!!! And I just praise Him!!!!
"We know not what we should pray for as we ought..." Rom 8:26
I share it because I hope it will also be a blessing and encouragement to all of you!
-----------------------
Much that perplexes us in our Christian experience is but the answer to our prayers. We pray for patience, and our Father sends those who tax us to the utmost; for "tribulation worketh patience."
We pray for submission, and God sends sufferings; for "we learn obedience by the things we suffer." We pray for unselfishness, and God gives us opportunities to sacrifice ourselves by thinking on the things of others, and by laying down our lives for the brethren.
We pray for strength and humility, and some messenger of Satan torments us until we lie in the dust crying for its removal.
We pray, "Lord increase our faith," and money takes wings; or the children are alarmingly ill; or a servant comes who is careless, extravagant, untidy or slow, or some hitherto unknown trial calls for an increase of faith along a line where we have not needed to exercise much faith before.
We pray for the Lamb-like life, and are given a portion of lowly service, or we are injured and must seek no redress; for "He was led as a lamb to the slaughter...and opened not his mouth."
We pray for gentleness, and there comes a perfect storm of temptation to harshness and irritability. We pray for quietness, and every nerve is strung to the utmost tension, so that looking to Him we may learn that when He giveth quietness, no one can make trouble.
We pray for love, and God sends peculiar suffering and puts us with apparently unlovely people, and lets them say things which rasp the nerves and lacerate the heart; for love suffereth long and is kind, love is not impolite, love is not provoked. Love beareth all things, believeth, hopeth and endureth. Love never faileth.
We pray for likeness to Jesus, and the answer is, "I have chosen thee in the furnance of affliction." "Can thine heart endure, or can thine hands be strong."
The way to peace and victory is to accept every circumstance, every trial, straight from the hand of a loving Faither; and to live up in the heavenly places, above the clouds, in the very presence of the throne, and to look down from the glory upon our environment as lovingly and divinely appointed.
-Author Unknown-
--------------------------
The moral of the story, "Be careful what you pray for, because you just might get it!!!" ;-)
I say that kinda jokingly, but seriously, as I am learning...God knows better than ourselves what we need, and due to some painful experiences in my life, I once tried to tie God's hands behind His back (if that is possible) and I told God, I don't want any more growth if it involves pain. While my life did not instantly become free of trial and pain...it did slowly become free of meaning and real joy, for I had limited God! I was not willing to allow God to send me things to help me grow, and when He did...I resented them.
Finally within this last year I have been able to release God's hands (as if I ever had them tied anyway) and tell Him, "God...no matter what you send me in my life, I want to grow and be close to YOU!!!! If it involves pain, I'm willing, if it involves trials and sacrifice I am willing......please don't let me limit what you want to do in my life! No matter what you bring, I will trust you!!!! My greatest goal is simply to be close to YOU!!!"
Since I've prayed that prayer.....well.....there's been some more trials and tears, but there is a peace that passeth understanding, and I know that He's only allowing what is for my best good!!!! The refining process!!! And I just praise Him!!!!
"We know not what we should pray for as we ought..." Rom 8:26
Friday, May 11, 2007
How many "Pigs" do I have?
I thought this went well with the following post: "Lord you can solve my problems, but don't take my pigs!!!"
"Lord, solve my problems, but save my pigs!"
Recently I've been able to attend and be part of a new ministry that's started on the Loma Linda University campus called "Connections." It's nice to have something inspiring to attend on Friday evenings, although I do miss being a part of the singing bands, as I can't do both. But I'm also excited about something that I can actually encourage non-Christian friends to attend, as it's very evangelistic and non-denominational in it's approach. In fact, eventually, we hope to start filming the evening meetings to use for Creator's Call programming.
However, the reason for my post this late Friday evening is not to talk logistics, or soul-winning tactics, but rather to share some things that God has been impressing upon my heart over this last week or so.
Last Friday's Connection meeting speaker had an interesting title to his talk. "Lord, solve my problems, but save my pigs." The essence of the sermon, based on the story from Mark 5 where Jesus cast the demons out of the demoniac and into the swine, was on how the people of the region responded to Jesus and the miracle, and how we respond in like today.
Some modern day examples he used went something like this: "Lord, help me to loose weight, but don't ask me to give up my favorite restuarant outings or favorite desserts!" "Lord, help me to have a more vibrant prayer life, but don't ask me to get up early in the morning and loose sleep so I can pray!" "Lord, help me to be a witness to my patients, but don't ask me to take the in depth time to connect to you, my source of all strength!" "Lord, help me not to have the same struggles as the world, but don't ask me to give up my entertainment styles or choices!" and the list went on. Of course, for each of us, there is a different list!
But I was thinking about it! How often do we look at God as a big "genie" in the sky..."Lord....please do this for me, or that for me...but don't ask me to take too much effort for it myself! I'm tired and overworked and running late...and besides...I don't want to look weird to those that are watching. So Lord...you work, ok?! And I'll just keep on doing what I know how to do!" But it can't work that way in the Christian life. No relationship grows without effort...no muscles are gained without sweat and hard work...and there's no true joy until you've experienced pain! This isn't to be a quiet boat ride down the river...it's a daily battle and march up the mountain of Faith and endless possibilities! Yes, there are rewards, there is sweetness, there is joy along the way...but it is a result of effort and work!
Now don't take me wrong....I'm not off on the "works" tangent! That's not my point at all...it's just that I've caught a fresh glimpse of the responsibility God has given me for my own life and the choices and priorities I take!
So, my new prayer is... "Lord...I need your power to help me solve my problems, and I need your strength to help me to be willing to let go of the pigs!"
Tonights meeting was another inspiring message...one that also really hit home, and one reason I am still up and awake! It was called "Wind Graspers" and if you want a hint, it was based off Ecclesiates 2. But since it's late...I should start trying to count sheep...or maybe I just need to go talk to the Shepherd :-). Needless to say, I'll have more to share on that later! All I can say is, "Thank you Lord for your longsuffering and patience as I continue to grow! Keep giving me NEW EYES to see!!!"
However, the reason for my post this late Friday evening is not to talk logistics, or soul-winning tactics, but rather to share some things that God has been impressing upon my heart over this last week or so.
Last Friday's Connection meeting speaker had an interesting title to his talk. "Lord, solve my problems, but save my pigs." The essence of the sermon, based on the story from Mark 5 where Jesus cast the demons out of the demoniac and into the swine, was on how the people of the region responded to Jesus and the miracle, and how we respond in like today.
Some modern day examples he used went something like this: "Lord, help me to loose weight, but don't ask me to give up my favorite restuarant outings or favorite desserts!" "Lord, help me to have a more vibrant prayer life, but don't ask me to get up early in the morning and loose sleep so I can pray!" "Lord, help me to be a witness to my patients, but don't ask me to take the in depth time to connect to you, my source of all strength!" "Lord, help me not to have the same struggles as the world, but don't ask me to give up my entertainment styles or choices!" and the list went on. Of course, for each of us, there is a different list!
But I was thinking about it! How often do we look at God as a big "genie" in the sky..."Lord....please do this for me, or that for me...but don't ask me to take too much effort for it myself! I'm tired and overworked and running late...and besides...I don't want to look weird to those that are watching. So Lord...you work, ok?! And I'll just keep on doing what I know how to do!" But it can't work that way in the Christian life. No relationship grows without effort...no muscles are gained without sweat and hard work...and there's no true joy until you've experienced pain! This isn't to be a quiet boat ride down the river...it's a daily battle and march up the mountain of Faith and endless possibilities! Yes, there are rewards, there is sweetness, there is joy along the way...but it is a result of effort and work!
Now don't take me wrong....I'm not off on the "works" tangent! That's not my point at all...it's just that I've caught a fresh glimpse of the responsibility God has given me for my own life and the choices and priorities I take!
So, my new prayer is... "Lord...I need your power to help me solve my problems, and I need your strength to help me to be willing to let go of the pigs!"
Tonights meeting was another inspiring message...one that also really hit home, and one reason I am still up and awake! It was called "Wind Graspers" and if you want a hint, it was based off Ecclesiates 2. But since it's late...I should start trying to count sheep...or maybe I just need to go talk to the Shepherd :-). Needless to say, I'll have more to share on that later! All I can say is, "Thank you Lord for your longsuffering and patience as I continue to grow! Keep giving me NEW EYES to see!!!"
Thursday, May 10, 2007
My Utmost for His Highest
Recently I've been reading a book by V. Raymond Edman called, "They found the Secret" - 20 Transformed lives that reveal a Touch of Eternity. From the testimonies of John Bunyan, to Dwight L. Moody, to Amy Carmichael, Hudson Taylor and many others, it has truly been a breath of inspiration and encouragement for the "higher calling" God has for each of us! Today the testimony I read about was that of Oswald Chambers, author of one of the most spiritually influential books of the last century, "My Utmost for His Highest."
Writing regarding Chambers testimony, the author notes: "The Almighty creates no desires deep in the human soul that He cannot Himself satisfy." A simple statement, but with profoundly deep meaning!
How amazing I thought, as I read. And how true!!!! HE HIMSELF does SATISFY!!!! Every longing, every need...while our petitions may not always be granted according to what we "think" we need....He truly does fill our needs according to His best plans...with HIMSELF!!! If only we had eyes to see!!
"But my God shall supply all your needs, according to His riches, in Glory by Christ Jesus." Phil 4:19
"I am the way, the truth and the life, no man cometh to the father but by me!" John 14:6
"I am come that they might have life and have it more ABUNDANTLY." John 10:10
But the inspiration doesn't stop there. How do we attain the spiritual heights of bliss and victory? The author continues:
Climbing in the Spirit is accomplished not by running, but by kneeling. It's accomplished not by sheer will power and determination, but by surrender. Despair of self leads to utter desperation, but beyond the mist lies the sunshine of God's presence. Many a soul will turn back to accustomed marshlands of defeat rather than brave the fogs of frustration...but it is by braving those very fogs that their victory is almost won!
Yes, as my friends Eric and Leslie have shared again and again, it's sooo easy to settle for spiritual mediocrity...to pitch our tents short of the promised land...just as long as they are pitched a few feet ahead of our comrades! (Afterall, if I think I am doing better than 99% of the rest of the professed Christians around me, isn't that good enough??) But No! No! No!!!! That's not what God intended. He longs to give us sooo much more...but as long as we keep striving in our own power and our own strength, we will never make it. It is only as we come to the realization of the utter helplessness of our strength and our utter inablity (is that a word) to fight the battle and climb the mountain...then, THEN, the real journey has just began!!!
So Oswald Chambers testimony has reminded me once again, the strongest man (or woman) is not the one with the biggest muscles or the most preached sermons...it's the one that knows how to stay surrendered and on their knees!
My prayer today: "Search me O God, and know my heart. Try me and know my thoughts, and see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting..." Ps 139:23,24
Writing regarding Chambers testimony, the author notes: "The Almighty creates no desires deep in the human soul that He cannot Himself satisfy." A simple statement, but with profoundly deep meaning!
How amazing I thought, as I read. And how true!!!! HE HIMSELF does SATISFY!!!! Every longing, every need...while our petitions may not always be granted according to what we "think" we need....He truly does fill our needs according to His best plans...with HIMSELF!!! If only we had eyes to see!!
"But my God shall supply all your needs, according to His riches, in Glory by Christ Jesus." Phil 4:19
"I am the way, the truth and the life, no man cometh to the father but by me!" John 14:6
"I am come that they might have life and have it more ABUNDANTLY." John 10:10
But the inspiration doesn't stop there. How do we attain the spiritual heights of bliss and victory? The author continues:
Climbing in the Spirit is accomplished not by running, but by kneeling. It's accomplished not by sheer will power and determination, but by surrender. Despair of self leads to utter desperation, but beyond the mist lies the sunshine of God's presence. Many a soul will turn back to accustomed marshlands of defeat rather than brave the fogs of frustration...but it is by braving those very fogs that their victory is almost won!
Yes, as my friends Eric and Leslie have shared again and again, it's sooo easy to settle for spiritual mediocrity...to pitch our tents short of the promised land...just as long as they are pitched a few feet ahead of our comrades! (Afterall, if I think I am doing better than 99% of the rest of the professed Christians around me, isn't that good enough??) But No! No! No!!!! That's not what God intended. He longs to give us sooo much more...but as long as we keep striving in our own power and our own strength, we will never make it. It is only as we come to the realization of the utter helplessness of our strength and our utter inablity (is that a word) to fight the battle and climb the mountain...then, THEN, the real journey has just began!!!
So Oswald Chambers testimony has reminded me once again, the strongest man (or woman) is not the one with the biggest muscles or the most preached sermons...it's the one that knows how to stay surrendered and on their knees!
My prayer today: "Search me O God, and know my heart. Try me and know my thoughts, and see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting..." Ps 139:23,24
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
"Is True Love WORTH waiting for??"
Thanks to my friends, Sarah and Nick, for letting me use this special photo!
Inspiration for my Single friends...
Recently I was talking with a friend about trusting God...even in the area of our relationships, which was a completely novel idea to her! "Who could imagine that GOD...of all ancient people...could actually work out our life story (much less our LOVE STORY) after His plans...and it be to our liking??!!! And not just to our liking...but far beyond our grandest dreams!!" She was aghast! Yet I have to chuckle to myself...and as my friends the Ludy's so beautifully share in their writing and personal testimony (and as my parent's also can testify), God truly does know what He's doing when it comes to LOVE!!! After all, He invented it, right?? He should know what He is doing!!! Yet, how often, we think we have to get our fingers in the pot and stir things around. We think, we fear, He doesn't know what He is doing!!! But He does...He so beautifully does! "IF ONLY" God must sigh, "if only they would trust me!!"
Lately, it seems that I too have been confronted alot more with these issues as I've watched more of my friends get engaged (literally) or begin new love relationships! It's been beautifully to see...and yet sometimes I also wonder, does God still have that kind of love in store for me? Being an incurable romantic for as long as I can remember (started planning my wedding when I was 5), I know the longing for human companionship and for a soul-mate to spend my life with...and yes, for someone to dress up for in a long white dress and be beautiful! Yet, as I look back over the years, over the tears, and over the ways that He has brought me, all I can say is, God is good! And there has been a purpose to His plan! And while I wish I could erase some of the mistakes I've made, I wouldn't trade the path He's given me and the love relationship and fulfillment that I've learned (and am still learning) to find in Him...I wouldn't trade it for all the world!! Wow...it just blows my mind when I look at the unceasing, unconditional and vast love there is in Him! (And there's more I discover each day!)
So, as the title of one of our new Creator's Call programs goes... "True Love IS Worth Waiting For!" And my prayer is that the many who watch will also be inspired, no matter the future, no matter the path...God does know what is best and He can be trusted...yes, even in the area of romance!!! But more than anything, He longs to fill our lives and hearts with more of Him...for He is the truest romantic of us all!!!!
By way of encouragement to my many single friends out there, I want to share a quote that I've had hanging on the back of my bedroom door at home for many years now! Countless times it's helped me to keep courage and keep focusing on what's really important. I hope it will also be a big encouragement to all of you!
Lately, it seems that I too have been confronted alot more with these issues as I've watched more of my friends get engaged (literally) or begin new love relationships! It's been beautifully to see...and yet sometimes I also wonder, does God still have that kind of love in store for me? Being an incurable romantic for as long as I can remember (started planning my wedding when I was 5), I know the longing for human companionship and for a soul-mate to spend my life with...and yes, for someone to dress up for in a long white dress and be beautiful! Yet, as I look back over the years, over the tears, and over the ways that He has brought me, all I can say is, God is good! And there has been a purpose to His plan! And while I wish I could erase some of the mistakes I've made, I wouldn't trade the path He's given me and the love relationship and fulfillment that I've learned (and am still learning) to find in Him...I wouldn't trade it for all the world!! Wow...it just blows my mind when I look at the unceasing, unconditional and vast love there is in Him! (And there's more I discover each day!)
So, as the title of one of our new Creator's Call programs goes... "True Love IS Worth Waiting For!" And my prayer is that the many who watch will also be inspired, no matter the future, no matter the path...God does know what is best and He can be trusted...yes, even in the area of romance!!! But more than anything, He longs to fill our lives and hearts with more of Him...for He is the truest romantic of us all!!!!
By way of encouragement to my many single friends out there, I want to share a quote that I've had hanging on the back of my bedroom door at home for many years now! Countless times it's helped me to keep courage and keep focusing on what's really important. I hope it will also be a big encouragement to all of you!
MOST WONDERFUL LOVE
Everyone longs to give themselves to someone, to have a deep soul relationship with another, to be loved thoroughly and exclusively.
But God to the Christian says, "No! Not until you are satisfied, fulfilled, and content with me alone - with giving yourself totally and unreservedly to me - to having an intensely personal and unique relationship with me, that I have so beautifully planned. You will never be totally happily united with another until you are united with me, exclusive of anyone or anything else, exclusive of any desires or longings.
I want you to stop planning, stop wishing and allow me to give you the most thrilling plan existing, one you cannot begin to imagine. I want you to have the best. Please allow me to bring this to you. You just keep watching me, expecting the greatest things. Keep experiencing the satisfaction that I am. Keep listening and learning the things I tell you. Just wait, that's all!! Don't be anxious, don't worry! Don't look around at the things others have gotten or what I have given them. Don't look at the things you think you want! Just keep looking off and away, up to me, or you will miss what I want to show you!
And then, when you are ready, I will surprise you with a love far more wonderful than any you would dream of!! You see, until you are ready, and until the one I have for you is ready (and I am working even at this moment to have both of you ready at the same time), until you are both satisfied exclusively with me and the life that I have prepared for you, you won't be able to experience the pure beautiful love that exemplifies your relationship with me, and thus is Perfect love!!
And dear one, I want you to have this most wonderful love! I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with me. I want you to be able to enjoy materially, and concretely the everlasting union of beauty, perfection, and pure love that I offer you with myself. (It is possible!) Know that I love you utterly! Believe it.........and be satisfied!!!!
- Author Unknown -
"Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him." I Cor 2:9
Tuesday, May 08, 2007
The Daffodil Principle
This is a story that my dad shared a little while back...funny thing is, not long ago, I visited the site that this story is telling about! See Slide show above for a full view of the glory! (Sorry family, for neglecting to post these photo's earlier! This happened over a month ago now!)
--------------------------------
STORY
Several times my daughter had telephoned to say, "Mother, you must come to see the daffodils before they are over." I wanted to go, but it was a two-hour drive. "I will come next Tuesday," I promised a little reluctantly on her third call.
Next Tuesday dawned cold and rainy. Still, I had promised, and reluctantly I drove there. When I finally walked into Carolyn's house I was welcomed by the joyful sounds of happy children. I delightedly hugged and greeted my grandchildren. "Forget the daffodils, Carolyn! The road is invisible in these clouds and fog, and there is nothing in the world except you and these children that I want to see badly enough to drive another inch!" My daughter smiled calmly and said, "We drive in this all the time, Mother." "Well, you won't get me back on the road until it clears, and then I'm heading for home!" I assured her. "But first we're going to see the daffodils. It's just a few blocks," Carolyn said. "I'll drive. I'm used to this." "Carolyn," I said sternly, "please turn around." "It's all right, Mother, I promise. You will never forgive yourself if you miss this experience." After about twenty minutes, we turned onto a small gravel road and I saw a small church. On the far side of the church, I saw a hand lettered sign with an arrow that read, " Daffodil Garden ." We got out of the car, each took a child's hand, and I followed Carolyn down the path. Then, as we turned a corner, I looked up and gasped. Before me lay the most glorious sight.
It looked as though someone had taken a great vat of gold and poured it over the mountain peak and its surrounding slopes. The flowers were planted in majestic, swirling patterns, great ribbons and swaths of deep orange, creamy white, lemon yellow, salmon pink, and saffron and butter yellow. Each different-colored variety was planted in large groups so that it swirled and flowed like its own river with its own unique hue. There were five acres of flowers. "Who did this?" I asked Carolyn. "Just one woman," Carolyn answered. "She lives on the property. That's her home." Carolyn pointed to a well-kept A-frame house, small and modestly sitting in the midst of all that glory. We walked up to the house. On the patio, we saw a poster. "Answers to the Questions I Know You Are Asking," was the headline. The first answer was a simple one. "50,000 bulbs," it read. The second answer was, "One at a time, by one woman. Two hands, two feet, and one brain." The third answer was, "Began in 1958." For me, that moment was a life-changing experience. I thought of this woman whom I had never met, who, more than forty years before, had begun, one bulb at a time, to bring her vision of beauty and joy to an obscure mountaintop. Planting one bulb at a time, year after year, this unknown woman had forever changed the world in which she lived. One day at a time, she had created something of extraordinary magnificence, beauty, and inspiration. The principle her daffodil garden taught is one of the greatest principles of celebration.
That is, learning to move toward our goals and desires one step at a time--often just one baby-step at time--and learning to love the doing, learning to use the accumulation of time. When we multiply tiny pieces of time with small increments of daily effort, we too will find we can accomplish magnificent things. We can change the world ... "It makes me sad in a way," I admitted to Carolyn. "What might I have accomplished if I had thought of a wonderful goal thirty-five or forty years ago and had worked away at it 'one bulb at a time' through all those years? Just think what I might have been able to achieve!" My daughter summed up the message of the day in her usual direct way. "Start tomorrow," she said. She was right. It's so pointless to think of the lost hours of yesterdays. The way to make learning a lesson of celebration instead of a cause for regret is to only ask, "How can I put this to use today?"
--------------------------------
STORY
Several times my daughter had telephoned to say, "Mother, you must come to see the daffodils before they are over." I wanted to go, but it was a two-hour drive. "I will come next Tuesday," I promised a little reluctantly on her third call.
Next Tuesday dawned cold and rainy. Still, I had promised, and reluctantly I drove there. When I finally walked into Carolyn's house I was welcomed by the joyful sounds of happy children. I delightedly hugged and greeted my grandchildren. "Forget the daffodils, Carolyn! The road is invisible in these clouds and fog, and there is nothing in the world except you and these children that I want to see badly enough to drive another inch!" My daughter smiled calmly and said, "We drive in this all the time, Mother." "Well, you won't get me back on the road until it clears, and then I'm heading for home!" I assured her. "But first we're going to see the daffodils. It's just a few blocks," Carolyn said. "I'll drive. I'm used to this." "Carolyn," I said sternly, "please turn around." "It's all right, Mother, I promise. You will never forgive yourself if you miss this experience." After about twenty minutes, we turned onto a small gravel road and I saw a small church. On the far side of the church, I saw a hand lettered sign with an arrow that read, " Daffodil Garden ." We got out of the car, each took a child's hand, and I followed Carolyn down the path. Then, as we turned a corner, I looked up and gasped. Before me lay the most glorious sight.
It looked as though someone had taken a great vat of gold and poured it over the mountain peak and its surrounding slopes. The flowers were planted in majestic, swirling patterns, great ribbons and swaths of deep orange, creamy white, lemon yellow, salmon pink, and saffron and butter yellow. Each different-colored variety was planted in large groups so that it swirled and flowed like its own river with its own unique hue. There were five acres of flowers. "Who did this?" I asked Carolyn. "Just one woman," Carolyn answered. "She lives on the property. That's her home." Carolyn pointed to a well-kept A-frame house, small and modestly sitting in the midst of all that glory. We walked up to the house. On the patio, we saw a poster. "Answers to the Questions I Know You Are Asking," was the headline. The first answer was a simple one. "50,000 bulbs," it read. The second answer was, "One at a time, by one woman. Two hands, two feet, and one brain." The third answer was, "Began in 1958." For me, that moment was a life-changing experience. I thought of this woman whom I had never met, who, more than forty years before, had begun, one bulb at a time, to bring her vision of beauty and joy to an obscure mountaintop. Planting one bulb at a time, year after year, this unknown woman had forever changed the world in which she lived. One day at a time, she had created something of extraordinary magnificence, beauty, and inspiration. The principle her daffodil garden taught is one of the greatest principles of celebration.
That is, learning to move toward our goals and desires one step at a time--often just one baby-step at time--and learning to love the doing, learning to use the accumulation of time. When we multiply tiny pieces of time with small increments of daily effort, we too will find we can accomplish magnificent things. We can change the world ... "It makes me sad in a way," I admitted to Carolyn. "What might I have accomplished if I had thought of a wonderful goal thirty-five or forty years ago and had worked away at it 'one bulb at a time' through all those years? Just think what I might have been able to achieve!" My daughter summed up the message of the day in her usual direct way. "Start tomorrow," she said. She was right. It's so pointless to think of the lost hours of yesterdays. The way to make learning a lesson of celebration instead of a cause for regret is to only ask, "How can I put this to use today?"
Sunday, May 06, 2007
Going to New Heights!
Well this last Friday was a High day for me! (Literally speaking!) Jen and I climbed to the top of Mt. San Bernadino (the big mountain that towers above our valley and the same mountain I can see from our living room window!) The elevation was about 10,600+ feet. We climbed about 4,000 of it from where we started, which probably isn't that much for most climbers...but for someone like me that hasn’t climbed a real mountain in almost a year...it was a work out!!
The day started for us about 3:30 am when we got up to finish packing supplies and get ready. We left Loma Linda at 5am and were hiking before 6am! (Notice the pic above with moon between the trees!) We made it to the summit by 11am...almost an hour ahead of what we'd planned! The total hike was almost 16 miles! ;-)
I'm hoping to climb Mt. Whitney with Jen and others this summer, so the training was good for me! The night after the big climb, I slept like a log...the most deep peaceful sleep I've had in a few weeks!!!! Hmmm.....maybe I should go climbing more often!
My great hiking partner!
Thanks Jen for the great hike and for helping push me to new heights of success! ;-) You're a great hiking partner, and also a great friend! And from now on, whenever I look out my living room window (from Loma Linda) and see Mt. San Bernadino, I shall remember this day together!
I love big logs!!!
This picture was taken as we were almost back to the car! By this time I was tired and ready for a rest...but not too tired of course to take just ONE MORE fun picture! As I've been learning...life is short, so make the most of what you've got! So, despite the aches and pains, I have no regrets...and I thank the Lord for one more day to grow and learn, and conqueor new challenges, and new mountain summits! Wow! What a great day!!!
To see a few more pics from our mountain adventure, go to: http://www.flickr.com/photos/94932435@N00/sets/72157594485594304/
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